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Why did the blonde climb the clear glass wall?
To see what was on the other side.

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How can you tell is a blond has been working on your computer?
White out on the screen.

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Two blondes walking together in the woods, come across a set of tracks...The
first blonde says. "Look ! Deer tracks! ". The second blonde says, "No,
those are Bear tracks!"... Then the train hit them...

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What does a blond say after a date?
Are you guys all on the same team?

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Why are blonde's breasts square?
They forget to take the Kleenex out of the box.

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A dumb blonde, a smart blond and Santa Claus jump off of a bridge, who makes
the bigger splash?
The dumb blonde because the others don't exist.

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A blonde at a party was telling her friend that she was off men for life. "They lie, they cheat, and they're just no good. From now on when I want sex, I'm going to use my vibrator."

"So, what will you do when the batteries run out and you can't have your orgasm?" asked her friend

"No problem, I'll fake it like always."

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How do you drown a blonde?
Put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of the pool.

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What do you call an intelligent blonde?
A Golden Retriever.

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What do you call a blonde talking between two brunettes?
Confused.

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What do you call a brunette talking between two blondes?
An interpreter.

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What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
I hope it's mine!!

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What's the difference between a blonde from (any city you like) and a garbage can?
At least the garbage can gets taken out once a week!

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What do you call a blonde on a college campus?
A visitor!

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How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday?
Tell her a joke on Friday.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and asked the bartender:
Brunette: "I'll have a B and C."
Bartender: "What is a B and C?"
Brunette: "Bourbon and Coke."
Redhead: "And, I'll have a G and T."
Bartender: "What's a G and T?"
Redhead: "Gin and Tonic."
Blonde: (getting the idea) "I'll have a 15."
Bartender: "What's a 15?"
Blonde: "A 7 and 7."

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WHAT DOES A BLONDE AND A BOTTLE OF BEER HAVE IN COMMON
THERE BOTH EMPTY FROM THE NECK UP

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away all the W's.

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Q: What do blondes and turtles have in common?
A: When laying on their back, they are both screwed!

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Q: Why does the blonde have bruises around her belley button?
A: Because her boyfriend is blond too

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Q: Why are there lipstick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?
A: Cause she blows the horn.

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Q: How do you know when a blonde is having a bad day?
A: she has a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pencil!

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Q: Why do blondes have square boobs?
A: They forget to take the Kleenex out of the box.

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Q: What's the mating call of a blonde?
A: I'm sooooooo drunk!

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Q: What's the mating call of a brunette?
A: I wish that damn blonde would leave!

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Q: What's the mating call of a redhead?
A: Next!

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Q: What do you say to a blonde to convince her to have sex with you?
A: Go ahead - have another beer!

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Q: How does a blonde turn on the lights after making love?
A: Opens the car door.

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Q: What do blondes and old cow-pies have in common?
A: The older they are, the easier they are to pick up.

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Q: What does a blonde do the first thing in the morning?
A: Introduces herself and goes home.

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Q: What does a bleached blonde and a 747 have in common?
A: They both have black boxes.

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Q: What does a blonde say after making love?
A: Do all of you guys play for the same team?

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Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you?
A: Tell her she's pregnant.

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Q: What did the blonde say to the doctor, after she found out she was pregnant?
A: Is it mine?

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Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a brick?
A: A brick doesn't follow you around after you lay it.

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Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a sack of garbage?
A: Garbage won't keep calling you after you take it out

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A beautiful, well-dressed blonde seats herself in the first class cabin on a cross-country flight, and settles herself in for the trip, smiling prettily at admiring passengers seated around her.

Underway, a flight attendant soon approaches the blonde and says, "Miss, I'm sorry, but I see that your ticket is for coach, and you're seated in first class; I'm afraid you'll have to move."

The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, and I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York to be a model."

Slightly incredulous, the attendant alerts the senior flight attendant. The senior attendant approaches the blonde and says, politely, "I'm sorry, Miss, but since your ticket is for coach, you'll have to move back."

The blonde replies,sweetly, "I'm blonde, and I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York to be a model" -- and shows no signs of moving.

Frustrated, the senior attendant informs the captain, and he says he'll deal with the problem. He turns over flight control, walks to the rear, and observes the blonde seated comfortably in first class.

Approaching her with a smile, the captain leans over and speaks quietly into the blonde's ear. Almost immediately, the blonde gathers her things, gets up, and moves quickly to the coach compartment.

Slightly amazed, the senior flight attendant asks the captain, "Captain, I'm impressed ... what did you say to her?"

The captain grinned slyly and said, "I just told her that the first class cabin doesn't go to New York."

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Q: Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
A: Because she kept throwing away the w's.

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Q: Why don't blondes eat pickles?
A: Because they get their heads stuck in the jars.

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Q: Why do blondes have the initials T.G.I.F on their shoes?
A: To remind them that toes go in first.

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Q: How do you get blonde's eyes to sparkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in her ear.

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Q: How do you give a blonde a brain transplant?
A: Blow in her ear.

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Q: What does a blonde say after you blow in her ear?
A: Thanks for the refill.

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Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!

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Q: What's the advantage of being married to a blonde?
A: You can park in the handicap zone.

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Q: What do you call a brunette standing between two blondes?
A: An interpreter.

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Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday?
A: Tell her a joke on Friday.

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Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes?
A: A "whine" cellar.

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Q: What does a smart blonde and a dinosaur have in common?
A: They're both extinct.

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Q: What's the difference between Big Foot and a smart blonde?
A: At least there are claims that Big Foot has been sighted.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: One. She holds the bulb and lets the world revolve around her.

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Q: What do you call five blondes standing all in a row?
A: A wind tunnel.

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Q: What is a blonde trying to do when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?
A: She's trying to hold onto a thought.

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Q: How do you drownd a blonde?
A: Put a scratch-and-sniff sticker on the bottom of the swimming pool.

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Q: What do you call a group of blondes in a freezer?
A: Frosted Flakes.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
A: 99. 1 to mix the cookies and 98 to peel the M&M's.

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Q: What to you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
A: The winner of hide and go seek.

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Q: What did the blonde say when they asked her if the flashinglight was on?
A: Yes, no, yes, no.......
 

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lol, aint blonde jokes the best eh
 

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What do u call a blonde doing a handstand?

A BRUNETTE!!

Love em! :lol:
 
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