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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi
So I don't actually own any reptiles, I found this forum when researching heaters for my home bizarly, but I'm thinking of starting my own religon surrounding Tortoises! I thought you guys might be interested to here about it.

Ok, so a few years ago I was living in Thailand and I used to love laying in bed watching the lizads chase eachother around the ceiling, there were hundreds of them. Now I miss this and I often go into pet shops when I'm passing to watch the lizards. Two years ago I was in America and I was watching the lizards in a pet shop, when I noticed the Tortoises, I've never seen them at pet shps in the UK.

I'd just been paid that day, and had $200 in my pocket, the exact price of the tortoise. It looked so cool, like a Dinosaur hatching from an egg. I wondered if being drawn to this tortoise and having the exact cost in my pocket was a sign. I picked up a book on Tortoise care, and the first thing it said was "Never buy a Tortoise on a whim" so I didn't buy it.

Since then though I'm always dooderling Tortoises, an American friend picked me up on this, she said she always thought Tortoises were stupid looking. I couldn't disagree more, I see them as these old wise creatures, and this got me thinking, the result of which was my Tortoise religon.

so here is the basic idea behind it.
There is a Tortoise and he gets his own room, that's made to look like a zen garden or something along those lines, the room is climate controlled which means even idiots like me shouldn't struggle too much to take care of the Tortoise, and basically when you have a problem or need advice you go and talk to your tortoise, obviously the tortoise in't going to talk to you, but you watch it's reactions nd try and guess what he is telling you from the reaction. Your subconcious will influence how you read the reactions and therefore in reality you are making these decsions based upon what you think. your making your own decsions.

I realise this idea will probably sound stupid to you, but it has been going around my head for weeks now, so its good to finally share it, and hey just maybe in 20 years time it'll catch on?
 

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please, never talk in public ¬_¬


chelonea, as docile and awe-inspiring as they may be to you, or other people, are not the 'messiah' or any significant role-model in life.

this original post just goes to show how easily people are way-layed by idealogical views such as religion or cults.

nice story though
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I think you miss the point, possibly my fault for telling the story out of context to people who do't know me, I'm very skepticle of religon in general, and this one seems like it'd be more fun than most
 

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Honestly? A religion which is openly based on you coming to your own decisions rather than following a set of rules or facing eternal damnation, or allowing you to sin but live guilt free once you've been forgiven by a man behind a curtain?

I like it better than most religions out there. :lol2:
 

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If you are so sceptical of religion in general how have you come to the point of inventing one of your own?

Tortoises, as wonderful and fascinating as they are, aren't famed for their intelligence. If you need to base the decisions that you make in your life on the reaction of an animal whose main focuses are food, shelter and sleep you're gonna end up messing it up real bad. The worst thing is (as with all other religions) that you will then blame your tortoise instead of taking responsibility for your own reactions, lol.

Fascinating as your musings are i suggest you just enjoy tortoises for what they are; intriguing and charming little characters who will accompany you right the way through the journey of your life.

Leave the life decisions to your own judgement.:lolsign:
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
As Anythingwithashell said, the point is that it's your subconcionse that is making the decsions not the tortoise, the fact that the tortoise doesn't activly help you make decsions is sort of crucial.

So much hostility to our new religon, oh well I guess this persecution will help unite us in the long run.
 

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Hi
So I don't actually own any reptiles, I found this forum when researching heaters for my home bizarly, but I'm thinking of starting my own religon surrounding Tortoises! I thought you guys might be interested to here about it.

Ok, so a few years ago I was living in Thailand and I used to love laying in bed watching the lizads chase eachother around the ceiling, there were hundreds of them. Now I miss this and I often go into pet shops when I'm passing to watch the lizards. Two years ago I was in America and I was watching the lizards in a pet shop, when I noticed the Tortoises, I've never seen them at pet shps in the UK.

I'd just been paid that day, and had $200 in my pocket, the exact price of the tortoise. It looked so cool, like a Dinosaur hatching from an egg. I wondered if being drawn to this tortoise and having the exact cost in my pocket was a sign. I picked up a book on Tortoise care, and the first thing it said was "Never buy a Tortoise on a whim" so I didn't buy it.

Since then though I'm always dooderling Tortoises, an American friend picked me up on this, she said she always thought Tortoises were stupid looking. I couldn't disagree more, I see them as these old wise creatures, and this got me thinking, the result of which was my Tortoise religon.

so here is the basic idea behind it.
There is a Tortoise and he gets his own room, that's made to look like a zen garden or something along those lines, the room is climate controlled which means even idiots like me shouldn't struggle too much to take care of the Tortoise, and basically when you have a problem or need advice you go and talk to your tortoise, obviously the tortoise in't going to talk to you, but you watch it's reactions nd try and guess what he is telling you from the reaction. Your subconcious will influence how you read the reactions and therefore in reality you are making these decsions based upon what you think. your making your own decsions.

I realise this idea will probably sound stupid to you, but it has been going around my head for weeks now, so its good to finally share it, and hey just maybe in 20 years time it'll catch on?
What you been smoking man?:bash:
 

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I'm honestly not trying to persecute you, lol. It's an interesting concept, that's all. It's when you talk about allowing your subconcious to interpret the reactions of a tortoise when you ask it something you've gotta admit that's pretty funny. Maybe it's just because as a tortoise keeper i already interpret my horsfields reactions and have some preconceptions about them. :blush:

Like when i come home from work and talk to her about my day and she looks at me and tilts her head she's thinking "when is this daft bloke going to stop making all those silly noises and feed me?"

:lol2:
 

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i'd probably say choose your tortoise very carefully......

the general behaviour of my horsfields include eat, stomp, bask, have a bath, pee and poo, climb on each other, dig in the soil, climb on their house, fall off, climb on the house - decide its a good game and fall off again, bask, stomp (i think you must be getting the picture here)

it would be hard to gather what reaction you would get to influence your subconcious from any of my torts but hope you have fun trying :)

andrea
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
They sound fun, maybe there telling you not to take life seriously.. but then that's not for me to say as it would defeat the point.

I really do want a Tortoise now, I travel to much at the moment to have pets though. Oh well maybe one day!
 

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You could make a little poo house and poo zen garden too and tell the poo your problems and see what comes into your subconscious - your poo could solve all your worries and troubles :2thumb:
 

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Tortoise Religion

I realise this idea will probably sound stupid to you, but it has been going around my head for weeks now, so its good to finally share it, and hey just maybe in 20 years time it'll catch on?

I think basically the snow has gone to your head. No offence meant! To offer us a Tortoise Religion is an isult to their "Creator". Religion means a "Belief in God" There is something missing in your life and it's not a tortoise! Perhaps you should be looking at your own life first.
 

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One
Flew
Over
The
Cuckoos
Nest

:crazy:
 

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I think basically the snow has gone to your head. No offence meant! To offer us a Tortoise Religion is an isult to their "Creator". Religion means a "Belief in God" There is something missing in your life and it's not a tortoise! Perhaps you should be looking at your own life first.
Mr Evo Lution? :whistling2:
 
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